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President Bartlet: Thank you very much. Thanks a lot. I wish I could spend more than a few minutes with you, but the polls don’t close in the east for another hour and there are plenty of election results to falsify.
You know with so many people participating in the political and social debate, who call in shows it’s a good idea to be reminded once in a while. It’s a good idea to be reminded of the awesome impact… The awesome impact.
I’m sorry, you’re Doctor Jenna Jacobs, right?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: It’s good to have you here.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: Thankyou.
President Bartlet: The awesome impact of the airwaves and how that translates into the furthering of our national discussions, but obviously also how that can…
Forgive me, Dr Jacobs. Are you an MD?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: A PhD.
President Bartlet: A PhD?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: Yes sir.
President Bartlet: In psychology? Theology? Social work?
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: I have a PhD in English Literature.
President Bartlet: I’m asking because on your show, people call in for advice, and you go by the name Dr Jacobs, and I didn’t know if maybe your listeners were confused by that and assumed that you had advanced training in psychology, theology or health care.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: I don’t believe they are confused, sir.
President Bartlet: Good. I like your show. I like how you call homosexuality an abomination.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: I don’t say homosexuality is an abomination, Mr. President. The Bible does.
President Bartlet: Yes, it does. Leviticus.
Dr. Jenna Jacobs: 18:22.
President Bartlet: Chapter and verse. I wanted to ask you a couple of questions while I had you here. I’m interested in selling my youngest daughter into slavery as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. She’s a Georgetown sophomore, speaks fluent Italian, always cleared the table when it was her turn. What would a good price for her be?
While thinking about that, can I ask another? My Chief of Staff Leo McGarry insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly says he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or is it okay to call the police?
Here’s one that’s really important ’cause we’ve got a lot of sports fans in this town: Touching the skin of a dead pig makes one unclean. Leviticus 11:7. If they promise to wear gloves, can the Washington Redskins still play football? Can Notre Dame? Can West Point?
Does the whole town really have to be together to stone my brother John for planting different crops side by side?
Can I burn my mother in a small family gathering for wearing garments made from two different threads?
Think about those questions, would you? One last thing, while you may be mistaking this for your monthly meeting of the ignorant tight ass club, in this building, when the President stands, nobody sits.